


Voices In My Head

by jack-of-alltrades (bumblebeeJacky), SpaceTurtleAdventure



Category: Banana Bus Squad
Genre: Alternate Universe - Apocalypse, Alternate Universe - Creatures & Monsters, Concussions, M/M, Magic, Memory Loss, Therapy Animal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-14 15:38:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18479233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bumblebeeJacky/pseuds/jack-of-alltrades, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpaceTurtleAdventure/pseuds/SpaceTurtleAdventure
Summary: Eyes scrunched shut, nose wrinkling and hands clenching as he thought hard, almost brought the migraine right back to full power as he remembered the faintest things, things he couldn’t make sense of just yet. A heavily accented voice singing songs he could barely remember, a hand on his shoulder as a soft voice warned them they would need to move soon, gentle hands wrapping wounds of his with gauze – his eyes opened and looked at his wrist. It was still wrapped, the gauze now dirty and a bit bloodied, but holding on.





	1. Chapter 1

His head was absolutely _throbbing_ , and he couldn’t remember too much and it hurt to _think_.

 

His head was _spinning_ when he sat up, causing him to flop back down with a low groan. His hands moved up quick to press against his cheeks, and run across his forehead and down the sides of his head as he waited it out, taking deep breaths. It took awhile for the migraine to start settling, his thoughts running wild before they started slowing down and he could finally start to comprehend words and memories. _Where am I? How did I get here? Why does my head hurt so badly?_ His eyes slowly opened, gold glinting in the dim light from the window - he saw a tiled ceiling, and when he shifted, he heard and felt the paper crinkling under his back, and the chill coming from the room.

 

Slowly, he sat up and observed his surroundings. A dark, small shop – or, what was a shop before it was clearly raided. Papers scattered, clothes on the ground or barely hanging on racks, doors to back freezers and fridges left open for anything that was not taken to go bad when the power shut down. A weight on his back kept him on the ground for a bit longer and he let his eyes slide shut as he tried to think back, what happened, how did he get here, why is he here by _himself_?

 

Eyes scrunched shut, nose wrinkling and hands clenching as he thought hard, almost brought the migraine right back to full power as he remembered the faintest things, things he couldn’t make sense of just yet. A heavily accented voice singing songs he could barely remember, a hand on his shoulder as a soft voice warned them they would need to move soon, gentle hands wrapping wounds of his with gauze – his eyes opened and looked at his wrist. It was still wrapped, the gauze now dirty and a bit bloodied, but holding on.

 

His eyes closed again, bit his lip. Chaotic laughter. Chaotic laughter that practically filled his ears despite the loneliness, a head resting on his shoulder as the guy laughed away at some stupid joke, arms around his waist and affection he couldn’t remember yet missed as the past blurred old memories.

 

He remembered a cold hand. A cold hand of metal, pressed softly to his cheek, a red glow as a soft voice asked if he was okay, if the headache was getting worse. He didn’t realize he was answering out loud before he was whispering a, “ _My head hurts so bad_ ,” to the emptiness surrounding him.

 

He could remember yelling, voices of friends he'd known for years blurring together in frustration and anger until he couldn't tell who was saying what.

 

He could remember pain, teeth digging into his wrist and then side and soulless black eyes meeting his own as a beast aimed to tear him apart piece by piece until there was nothing left of Evan Fong, the great _Vanoss._

 

He could remember everything slowing down, his brown eyes struggling to stay open as his warm blood soaked the pavement while the creature was shot out of the skies as it tried to escape when they took notice.

 

**_stop, stop, stop, it's too much_ **

 

His eyes opened slowly, hot tears creating wet tracks down his cheeks as he looked ahead yet stared at nothing. Slowly, he climbed to his feet, wobbly and unsteady. He remembered a brunette boy, just a little one who was learning to walk, stumbling into his arms with infectious loud laughter because the falls didn't faze him. The blurry, faint memory of bubbly laughter faded in his ears as he wobbled on his feet, a heavy weight on his back trying to pull him down all the same. He felt like some invisible force was pulling him forward, an ethereal voice floating around his head whispering, _come find me_ as he stepped forward.

 

He swallowed thickly and looked out the door, saw nothing - no cars, no creatures, no people, and he spoke, voice soft and quiet as the breeze past the broken metal and glass door, _I will_.

 

It looked like the streets were just as messy as the store, if not more so. Garbage littered the streets - and much to his horror and disgust, was that blood on the pavement?

 

Maybe it was his own. He couldn’t be sure. It hurt to move, but he stumbled forward regardless, caught his balance with a hand on the door frame as his free hand pushed his hair out of his face, golden eyes scanning the empty streets, destroyed buildings and abandoned cars. How long had he been here? The sun was covered by the clouds, a slight chill in the air. A movement behind him almost caused him to fall again, unused the weight he was trying to support - and why would he be used to it? His heart seemed to just… sink as he looked around the streets, swallowed thickly and tried to put a plan together in his head.

 

He wasn’t really sure where he came from, how he got into the store in the first place, but there were more things to worry about. Breath deep, in and out, count to ten. His heart settled in his chest and somehow for the first time since he woke up and his head slowly turned to the side, catching sight of soft brown feathers, a part of the big wings attached to his back. His mouth opened and closed, swallowed again as he kept up the deep breaths to keep an even heartbeat and a calm mind. He heard of the mutations, of people exposed to things they shouldn’t have becoming things they _weren’t_ , things that should be impossible.

 

One of the wings moved, and he moved his feet, released the door frame to press a hand to his own feathers. Soft just like he thought they were, white, black and brown blending together. It took him a few more minutes to get his head back down from the clouds as his mind wandered once more while his fingers trailed through his fingers, tested movement and the feathers. He did regret tugging a feather out on accident though when he pulled, but hey, now he knows he can feel pain from them, right?

 

He wasn’t about to risk flying, however. He pushed his own wings gently, slowly and awkwardly folding them up against his back as much as he could. He moved stiffly, trying to account for the weight against his back he hoped he’d get used to soon. For now, he didn’t have much of a plan. Only a goal; find them. The chaotic laughter, colorful hair, a heavily accented voice. A red eye.

 

With nowhere else to go and nothing else to do, he started down the street, glancing left and right into long since abandoned buildings. He could kind of remember seeing a news report, but all he remembered from it was a warning for everyone to basically abandon ship - stay indoors or go out with extreme caution and blame no one when they inevitably died or got hurt. The news reporter said it much more politely.

 

There was nothing really worth noting. Cars were abandoned due to the traffic, to people deciding they’d have better luck running than sitting and waiting for them and now were long since dead. Buildings, too, abandoned. There was _nothing_ to say. He stopped in front of yet another store, shifting his weight on his feet and glancing down to the ripped, bloodied once white shirt he wore. He picked up a jacket off the ground, seemingly in good shape aside from the dirt on it. He hung onto it, slinging it over his shoulder before he walked on, hoped equally that he’d find someone and that he _didn’t_ due to the state he was in.

 

His nose scrunched as he stopped yet again, looking down at his own shirt. It wasn’t like he could walk around _shirtless_ , but would that really be so bad considering the giant hole in the side? He pulled the shirt up to press a hand lightly to where the blood soaked through. Nothing. He looked at his hand again, considering. How long had he had the gauze on for?

 

He made a mental note to leave it alone until he found the person that dressed his past wounds in the first place to ask _them_ what to do. He wasn’t a doctor _before_ , nor was he a doctor _now_.

 

_“You’ll do amazing, Ev! You’ve always had a talent for these things!” Evan didn’t know what to say, heart pounding and mouth dry as he adjusted the guitar in his hands. He trusted the man - he’d almost raised Evan, become more of a fatherly figure than his own at times. He knew he’d do okay logically, but that didn’t soothe his racing heart as the time came and he was called to the stage. The tight hug he was given was what soothed him at last, at least a little bit as the tension in his shoulders faded. Words of confidence from his best friend gave him exactly what he needed to do this, to step up beside her, hold his fingers and his favorite pick to the strings and play his heart out._

 

He shakes his head and keeps on moving, trusting something, maybe that whisper, to lead him the right way. Maybe if he found scissors he could cut the shirt off, but that was a _later_ worry, not a _now_ worry.

 

Movement caught his eye to his right, and his gaze followed, but he didn’t see anything. He furrowed his brows, his wings even moving a bit as he turned more towards… Whatever it was he’d seen. He swore he could feel eyes on him, and god, the paranoia it was filling him with as he didn’t see anyone. His mind was a brief repeat of _run run run_ , but he didn’t. He stayed in place, looking left and right until he caught sight of someone. A man, standing by an alley and staring his way - at him directly.

 

Fight or flight - stay and figure out what was going on, or turn on his heel and run as much as he could with heavy wings. Weighing the pros and cons could possibly take too long. He stared owlishly at the person, bit hard into his lip as the man stepped out from the alley. Something else stood beside him, a sort of black mist in the form of a person. _Run_. They got closer. Clearly, no cars were coming, nor would they be; nothing held them back from coming closer.

 

Vanoss decides to run but doesnt get to far because of gravity, and like his memories from earlier, he met the pavement. A voice called his name. Confused, he tried to stand up but managed to just stay down as the figures caught up to him. Surprisingly, he got hugged when they were at his sides. Pulled up and into the chest of a stranger as words spilled from them. His racing heart slowed to a normal pace in his chest. He wasn’t being hurt, he wasn’t at risk - why would a killer hug him?

 

_“Evan, you fucker!” His friend yelled as he grinned at the screen, pulled the trigger to create an explosion in the video game and take his friend with him. Another voice simply laughed hard into the mic as he watched the chaos he created unfold before his very eyes. Evan was a kind, somewhat shy and quiet man, but when he played video games, he got loud, he got violent and his chaos matched up with his best friend’s, and what a feat that was. “I trusted you!” “And what a mistake that was!”_

 

“Evan, god, I’m so glad you’re okay!” He shook his head and jerked back a bit, looking up with wide gold eyes to meet theirs, one pair wide hazel, and the other bright brown. “Evan…?” The one with hazel eyes seemed confused. They knew his name. He _knew_ those voices, where did he know those voices…?

 

“Evan? _Are_ you okay?” The one with brown eyes asked, crouched down in front of him and where did the shadow guy go? His mouth opened, but no sound came out. The one with hazel eyes shifted, crouching down in front of him. He felt frozen as the warm hands pressed to his cheeks before looking at the gauze exposed from his shirt, and around his hand. “Does it hurt?” He asked, and Evan found himself so slowly shaking his head. No, it didn’t hurt. He wasn’t sure _why_ it didn’t, his shirt was _wrecked_ with his own blood, but he wasn’t really in pain. His head didn’t count.

 

His mouth moved again, a soft, frustrated sound escaping. A little cough, and then he could speak, voice low, likely sounding about as uneasy as he looked.

“Head.”

“Head?”

“Hurts?”

A look of understanding passed both their faces, and they helped him stand up on wobbly legs. “Wh… Who are…? What…” What to ask first, and how to even ask? “You can’t remember?” Brown eyes asked, and he nodded a little. He could only try and remember so much before his head felt like a bad trip at a rave. “My name is Brock, his name is Anthony.” Hazel eyes - Brock - introduced, and Evan mouthed the names to himself for a moment before he was asking, “Shadow guy…?” and the man, Brock, was laughing softly, pointing to Anthony.

 

Him? _He_ was the shadow guy? He didn’t _look_ like a shadow guy. A sort of black mist started to swirl around the man, and within moments, he was back to the strange shadowy figure Evan had seen across the street. _Weird_ . “You have wings.” Brock observed at last. _Was he just ignoring it before?_

 

Evan frowned and opened his mouth but bowed over instead, another memory hitting.

 

_“Evan!” The shout made him burst into a fit of uncontrollable giggles, watching the character fly across the screen. They always ended up like this, they riled each other up and soon their focus went less on their friends and more onto each other. Likely why so many jokes floated around about them, but it didn’t really bother them much. Maybe the gay jokes only fueled them. Okay, so definitely. “You- you- you fucker!” The man giggled away, that chaotic laughter that put a big smile on his face each time he heard it._

 

 _“Hey, you trusted me, you it coming,” He teased, stuck his tongue out at his screen despite knowing full well he couldn’t be seen. “Don’t be maaad! You did it to me earlier too!” “Yeah, yeah!” Jon laughed away. “You’re still- still an asshole, though.” “You right.” Evan responded right off the bat, smile fond as he looked at the screen. Something twisted in his gut after a moment, and he was speaking before he thought the words over. “Hey, man, you know I love you, right?” Silence, then a snort. “Never- never thought I’d see the- the- the day Vanoss con- confesses to me.” Evan groaned softly, leaning back in his chair and adjusting his mic appropriately. “_ **_No_ ** _, you dummy. Like… Like.._ **_Ugh_ ** _!” “I got it, I got it.” Suddenly, Jon’s voice was clear. Clear like when he sung, or when he was so focused. The times were rare and short, but they were there. That was how he knew Jonathan was being serious. “I got it. I love you too, Evan.” He needs Jon. He needs Jon by his side, he needs Jon’s directions and Jon’s presence to soothe his frazzled mind, to keep him sane, to tell him what to do when he can’t decide for himself..._

 

 _I ne_ ed to find Jonathan. Evan blinked and lifted his head again to see the confused, wildly concerned from how unresponsive Evan had been for a couple minutes. Something changed. He felt cold. He felt so, _so_ cold and _so_ hot all the same, his head was **_spinning_**. He wanted to pull the gray shirt off but his wings wouldn’t allow it. They grew more and more worried as Evan jerked himself away from them, wings starting to flap to help in his effort of pushing himself back. _No_ , **_no_** this was _wrong_ this was _wrong_ and he was supposed to be with _someone else_ he was supposed to be _somewhere else_.

 

 _Where was Jon? He_ **_needed_ ** _Jon_ , _fuck_ he needed to get _out_ of here and back to _him_ . Evan started to _shake_ and his wings started to flap even more wildly. He couldn’t _breathe_. He could feel one of his wings hit something but it didn’t matter. Dots started to flash before his eyes and he couldn’t hold on any longer.

  
_Where is Jon?_ Was his last thought before the darkness hit.   


	2. Chapter 2

He didn’t say much after he woke up, blearily looking up at Brock as the man checked his hand properly, watching Evan’s tired face as he moved his hand around and adjusted the gauze. In all honesty, he looked ready to pass right back out, and Brock couldn’t blame him. He pressed on where the wound was, fingers gentle, and on the lack of a change in Evan’s expression, he started to remove the gauze.

 

Evan’s eyes slid shut again, seeming to be a little soothed by the gentle touches to his hand. There was still a bit of blood dried to his skin, but Evan made no comment or sound as Brock licked his thumb, ran it along where the forming scar on his wrist was. A soft, sympathetic noise left Brock’s throat as he ran his thumb over it again. It looked almost completely healed, his thumb following the lines. Evan didn’t seem to be in any pain at all, and it seemed almost impossible for him to heal so quickly. Almost. “Evan?” A quiet hum in response. He didn’t reopen his eyes.

 

“I pro _ mise I’ll protect you.” Evan grinned a bit, leaned his head back against his companion’s chest to look at him, smile bright as he looked into the blue eyes he loved so much. “I know, you goof. I love you too.” Arms, gentle and warm as ever, slid around his waist, held Evan on his lap as his face pressed into Ev’s shoulder, a little laugh escaping the man. “I really do, you know… I don’t know, man. I’m glad I got to meet you. I’m glad I have you.” _

 

_ “I’m glad I have you too… I really do love you.” He whispered, squirming on his lap before he turned to look at him. One of his hands rested on his cheek, the other carded through short hair. “Hair’s getting long again. You’ll wanna cut it if you don’t wanna look girly,” He teased lightly and the other laughed, knew there was no bad intent behind the comment. He liked having his hair short - they both did. Evan ran his fingers through the dark locks for a few more minutes before he spoke again. “I really do. I love you…” _

 

_ “Evan…” _

 

_ “No, I’m serious. Your hair is really soft, and… And your eyes are really pretty. Your eyes are like the ocean or the sky… And you’re really brave and nice… I mean that. You’re one of the nicest people I know. Thank you for being my boyfriend, sure, but like… More than that, thank you for being my  _ **_friend_ ** _ …” _

 

Evan awoke with a start once more, gold eyes wide. The dream wasn’t particularly  _ scary _ , so much as confusing, overwhelming. His mind was on the repeat of the day before,  _ Jon, Jon, Jon _ , but he still had no clue who this  _ Jon  _ even  _ was _ . He swallowed and observed the room before he looked down at himself with a brief memory of earlier - or the night before? He didn’t know how long he’d been asleep. His headache was completely gone. He praised whoever this  _ Brock _ guy was for the comfortable bed, his wings stretched out a little off the side of the bed. The gauze around his waist and hand were gone too, as was his bloody shirt. Fuck, how was he gonna get dressed now?

 

He was slow to get up out of the bed, moving his wings slowly. He looked them over, slowly but surely resting one of them in his lap as much as he could. His arm went around his wing, fingers starting to slowly card through his own feathers. He did the same with the other wing for a moment, more getting a feel for them once again than anything. With a huff, Evan threw his legs over the side of the bed, slowly getting up. He was still a bit uneasy in more ways than one, but he slowly walked himself to the door of the small bedroom. He paused outside it, pressing his ear to the wood. He could hear the same voices as before, muffled but there, discussing him. What to do about him, how he couldn’t remember them, his wings, his panic attack, his apparent mutterings about a  _ Delirious _ . 

 

The voices were starting to get closer, and he was about to open the door when it opened just as he raised his hand. Anthony stood there, looking surprised to see Evan up. They stared at each other in silence for a minute before Anthony smiled wide at him, held his arms out. A moment of silence passed before Evan stepped closer, hesitated before wrapping his arms around Anthony. Something about it just felt right, to be held by someone who apparently was a friend of his.

 

Anthony released him after a moment, softly patting his back between his wings. “Come on, buddy,” He stated, leading the confused winged man out of the room to the main room where Brock was sitting on the couch. “We need to head out soon.” Brock said softly, and Evan’s head slowly tilted. “Where?” he asked in a soft tone. Anthony and Brock exchanged worried glances. “Home.” they replied. Evan blinked, still confused and wondered, do they not realize that he doesn't know anything? He took a deep breath and asked the question they all had been dreading.

 

_ Who are you and who is Jon? _

 

Both sucked in deep breaths, eyes wide, “Evan, what do you mean?” Frustrated, Evan shook his head, a bad idea in hindsight as he clutched his head in pain, dropped a little bit. “Fuck, did we check for a head injury?”

 

“No, Evan I need to see your head.” Evan blinked at Brock, who stood up and stepped over. He got Evan to sit down on the couch and Brock stood beside the couch as Anthony sat beside him, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze while gentle fingers made Evan lower his head, running through his hair softly as he examined him. After a few minutes, Brock,  _ Brock _ of all people, uttered a few swears and Anthony looked over before checking Evan’s head as well. Blood matted into his hair on the back of his head, and when Brock pressed gently on the area, Evan’s head ducked further, a soft whine passing from his lips. Shit.

 

Brock had to go dig through the bathroom for some kind of medical supplies to help and Anthony comforted Evan with gentle squeezes to his hand and soft reassurances that he’d be okay. “We’ll get your memory back, Ev,” He murmured, wrapping an arm around his neck to gently hug him close as Brock stepped out of the bathroom. “I promise.”

 

Some things felt right, and some things felt incredibly wrong. Being there with them, gentle hands cleaning out blood from his hair and skin with a wet rag while another simply held him, offering comfort,  _ that _ felt right.  _ They _ felt right. Whoever Jon was, felt right. They would help him. They’d get him home.

 

_ “You really love him, don’t you?” Brock asked softly, their characters idle in the long forgotten game. Evan stayed silent for a long moment, considering what to say to his friend. Even if he didn’t say anything, he was sure Brock would understand. But still, Evan was speaking, voicing thoughts, putting his voice to his heart. “Yeah. Yeah, I do.” As much as he teased him, patronizing his boyfriend and made jokes about him, he wasn’t mean, and he wouldn’t let anyone else be mean to him either. They’d been in the middle of a conversation with everyone else when Evan’s comment popped up on one of his videos, cursing out everyone who genuinely thought he was stupid or bad at games or mean spirited. Slowly but surely, everyone started giggling or laughing as Evan fumed softly. As they laughed, he heard his boyfriend say softly among the laughter, “Thank you, Ev. I love you too.” _

 

They needed to get home. He had no idea where that was, but he needed to go  _ home _ . Brock carefully wound gauze around his head, made sure it wasn’t too tight or loose and pressed a little kiss to his forehead, rather motherly. “Come on, we need to get a move on, okay?”

 

Evan took a deep breath and stood up. He stumbled before Brock caught him. “Here, just walk with me, okay?” and started a slow shuffle out to the lobby. “We  _ really  _ can’t do this the whole way.” Evan huffed. Anthony smirked and shook his head at his bitching, and to Evan’s shock, easily picked him up. “Alright, princess here we go.”

  
It’s time to get a move on. It’s time to get back  _ Home _ . They walked off in the early morning light.


	3. Chapter 3

Everything was going okay until the  _ fire nation  _ attacked or at least, a monster with some serious fire magic. The smell of smoke clogged Evan’s nose as the monster of lava and rock hurled more flaming trees at them. They had been moving through the sunny woods at a steady rate for most of the day when the smell of fire started and ground started to shake, and through the trees came a fire demon. A  _ massive  _ creature, created in the depths of the Earth that was brought to the surface by the flow of lava from a eruption of a volcano and was  _ very  _ unhappy about it. The boys stared, and the fire demon stared back before casually throwing a flaming boulder at them. Anthony tossed Evan at brock with a yell and sank into the shadows. Brock grabbed the now fearful and fluffy Evan and hurried them down a steep hill, getting some distance from the fire demon.

“Where did Anthony go?!”

“I don’t know!”

 

Evading another fire projectile, the boys ducked behind some roots and rocks. Just to be scared  _ shitless  _ then, Anthony reappeared beside them. “Where did you go?”  

“Not important, but I found a river not too far from here!” 

“Fuck, okay, we need to lead the monster to the river.” 

 

“And then what? Do we trip it into the river?!” Evan screeched as another flaming tree went flying other their heads. “Well... “

“That’s not going to work, the thing is slow but has one  _ hell  _ of a throw and you two can’t just turn into  _ shadows _ .” 

“It doesn't  _ matter _ , we don’t have a better plan, where is the river?” Anthony swore but pointed towards the east. They waited a second for another fire boulder to roll by before the boys started to run. Weaving and ducking between the trees and roots and dodging whatever flaming nature came flying behind them, the boys had to come to stop.

 

“Anthony, why is this giant canyon here?”

“Um, well...  _ fuck _ .”

“Based on the river running through it, I would say erosion.” Evan  _ ‘helped’ _ . 

“Fuck, do we just  _ dive _ ?” 

“I’m pretty sure Evan would just  _ drown  _ with the wings on his back.”

“You two could go and I could make a glide for it?”

“ _ No _ !” came from the both of them. “We need to find a way around.”

 

“Well, better make it  _ quick  _ because we’re running out of  _ time _ .” Evan stared at the two as they tried to figure out some other way to get around, flaming boulders starting to hit closer now and they were really running out of time. Evan made his decision and pushed Brock off the edge. “ _ What are you doing _ ?” screamed Anthony as he watch Brock fall. “ _ Saving your lives _ !” before Evan dove off the edge. It didn’t  _ matter  _ if he drowned, he  _ didn’t  _ want these two to die. Closing his eyes one last time, Evan prayed it would be quick, and was surprised when a blur crashed into him and grabbed onto the side of the canyon.

 

“ _ What the fuck are you dumbasses doing _ ?!”

 

A fucking  _ titan  _ apparently rescued him given the size of the man.  Evan’s eyes were wide as his wings flapped a bit, but the tight grip the guy had on him helped him from falling down to the water below. “What the  _ fuck _ are you doing, Evan?!” He hissed, his free hand hanging onto the cliff. Evan swallowed thickly as he glanced down at the water, back up at the guy’s blue eyes and wrapped both arms tight around him. He huffed and released him to hang onto the cliff with both hands, starting to climb back up - and lecture Evan on the incredibly reckless plan.

 

As confused as Evan was, he didn’t say anything, figuring he was just another friend Ev couldn’t remember. When he glanced down, he could see someone else in the water below, retrieving Brock. He could hear the furious monster above on actual land, and he hoped with the mild calmness the giant had, that he and whoever was with him had a plan for dealing with the beast.

 

As their heads popped up from the edge of the cliff and the man climbed onto land, huffing softly, Evan could see a smaller man with a monkey mask on, a red jacket, and military looking gear. And more notably, a  _ gun _ in his hands, firing at the demon as it got angrier and angrier. He didn’t seem frightened in the slightest, only moving or backing away when he needed to. Thunder boomed loud above them, and Evan’s heart leapt to his throat as he sat in the grass after the guy let go of him, wide eyes watching the dark storm clouds start swirling above them.

 

It happened again, near deafening, and his hand found the stranger’s. “Who are you?” He found himself asking as he stared at the sky. Tyler furrowed his brows as he looked over at Evan, just staring. Evan looked over and stared right back, and Tyler eyed the gauze around Evan’s head before softly asking, “Is this a joke?” And Evan slowly shook his head. Silence. Tyler yelled, “ _ Fuck _ !” as his fist hit the grass for a moment before moving over, pressing lightly into the bandages and uttering much softer apologies as Evan flinched. “Fuck, sorry, Ev…”

 

Evan put a hand around his wrist, looked up at the sky blue eyes and tilted his head. “What’s your name?” “Tyler.” He grumbled, pulled his hand back to run his fingers over Evan’s hair and the gauze for a moment. “Nogla - our other friend - is getting Brock with Anthony.” He explained before Evan even had a chance to ask. “Lui’ll deal with the demon.” Evan looked over at Lui, and the monkey masked man looked back for a moment to wave before his focus went back to the demon.

 

Tyler looked over to the side where his other companion stood, what appeared to be a sort of ball of lightning crackling in his hand as he watched the sky, focusing. “What’s he doing?” Evan whispered, to which Tyler chuckled softly, explained rather easily. “Mini’s a witch. He’s making a storm.”

 

They could  _ hear _ the absolute fury from the demon the second raindrops started to beat down on the lava and stone. Evan and Tyler looked over as Lui pulled out- oh. “Fuck’s sake.” The taller one sighed, stood up and helped Evan do the same, but his exasperation and frustration disappeared as he saw Evan stumble into him a little. “Can you walk?” He asked, voice much softer than it was three minutes ago. Evan shook his head in response, and Tyler let him climb onto his back instead, arms under the owl’s legs to support him. “I got you.” He assured Evan, stepping over to where they’d be safe at Mini’s side. “I got him.” He said, not missing the look of relief on the witch’s face when he glanced at the two.

 

The explosion had Evan pressing his face into the back of Tyler’s shirt, the other two watching Lui’s handiwork with little grins as the rain hitting both them and the demon got harder. Lui had the biggest grin on his own face as the rocks and lava sizzled and shot high into the air before hitting the ground hard.

 

With his work done, Lui darted back over to them, had the voice of a little kid as he asked, “Is Vanoss okay?” Vanoss? Tyler simply nodded, giving him a little smile. “Yeah. He’s… Well…” His voice trailed off, and Evan peered over his shoulder to see the piled up mess of the monster, and then the worried, hopeful looks of Mini and Lui. “I, uh…” He started softly, flapped his wings a bit and saw the look of wonder on Lui’s face. “I can’t… I can’t remember anything. I get… Small pieces here and there, but…” Understanding crossed Mini’s, and his hand went up to rest on Evan’s arm, a reassuring little smile. “It’ll be okay. I’m sure it’s only temporary.”

 

Tyler set Evan down, and immediately, Lui pulled him into a hug. Evan didn’t hesitate to hug him back. Soon, Brock - soaked to the bone - appeared alongside a man with a sort of green tint to his skin, a leaves coming from his hair. Evan tilted his head as he watched Brock chat away with the… The green man, just as the others had done, went in to hug Evan when he saw him. Brock gently tugged the tall man back with a smile, softly explained his injuries and lack of memory as the winged man found the pile of rocks that once was the demon much more interesting. 

 

The others grouped together and started to talk among themselves while Evan took a seat. He let the last of the warm rain gently soak his face and took a moment just to  _ breathe _ . A few minutes later, the group started to break apart and Anthony waved at Evan before melting into the shadows. 

 

“Where’s he going?” Evan whispered to himself and was surprised to be answered by the witch.

“Heading back home to tell them we found you and about your injuries.”

“Oh. Will he be okay by himself?”

“Not a lot can capture a shadow.”

“Okay, and it’s Mini right?”

“Yep, or Craig, but speaking speaking of injuries, do you mind if I take a look?”

 

Evan nodded in agreement but promptly jumped and fluffed up when green began to glow form Craig’s hands. “Oh shit, sorry, I’m going to use a little bit of healing magic to check everything, is that okay?”

“As long as it doesn’t hurt.” 

 

He only laughed before washing him in green glow. It was soothing and it felt familiar, but it stopped after a moment and Craig called to the group with a frown “Nogla, can you come here a sec? I need a boost.” The green man walked over and placed a hand on Craig’s shoulder. “Tire yerself out wit’ the storm earlier?” The Irish man asked, Mini only shrugged. He started the green glow again while Nogla started to sing something in a language Evan didn’t understand. Craig placed his hands on Evan’s head this time. 

 

_ He could feel himself falling, further, and further, and knew he wouldn’t make it. Evan laughed bitterly and wished he could fly but knew it was hopeless. He slammed into the ground and wished once more that he could have just flown away like Rynx but he wasn’t an owl. He was only Evan Fong. _


	4. Chapter 4

Evan pulled away with a gasp and scrambled away from Mini and Nogla, his heart racing.  The two exchanged confused looks before looking back at the clearly frightened Evan. He breathed deep, shivers running down his spine at the memory. He wasn’t sure what to do, and they looked so concerned. He swallowed thickly, forcing himself to not shove them away as Daithi rested an arm on his shoulder. The tree spirit made himself seem harmless, sitting down in front of Evan and crossing his legs. He was still nervous, but Daithi rested his hands in his lap, and after a moment, Craig mimicked the position at his side. Craig took one of Evan’s hands, hushing him softly. “Easy, Evan, it’s okay.” “Just breathe.” Daithi added.

 

He bit hard into his lip, watching them closely before he shifted himself closer, hesitantly took one of Daithi’s hands and just… Held onto them as he breathed, let the terror of the brief memory fade away. It was still terrifying, but it was easier to deal with them at his sides. “What was it?” Craig finally asked. Evan shook his head however, looking away from him as he muttered, “Not… Not right now.” It would be better for him to talk to them, to tell them what it was and air out the thoughts and memories, but he couldn't. Too much was going on, there was no time to waste, was there?

 

He’d tell them later, he promised himself as he squeezed their hands.  _ Later _ .

 

Tyler frowned at the sorry state of all of them. “Let’s head back to the cars before it gets to dark out.”

“Cars?’ Evan perked up at the words. “Yeah, how have you been traveling?”

“Walking? Well, Evan was being carried.”

“Moo, what happened to your car?”

“Got possessed.” Everyone blinked at that and Lui started to laugh. “Did the sigils not hold up?”

 

“Not in the slightest against the  soot sprites.” Mini choked at that, and Lui and Nogla keeled over laughing. Tyler pinched the bridge of his nose, but still let out a chuckle. 

 

“Alright, well, let’s head back and get some food and towels, and start heading back home.”

 

They all started to head back to the cars, avoiding smoldering remains from the fire demon and its rampage. When they reached the cars, the fun part started; who goes where? 

  
“Evan is  _ not  _ going to fit in the car.”

“Why...?  _ Oh _ , the wings, yeah forgot about those.”

 

Evan really needed better friends because the amount of people forgetting the wings on his back was concerning. Lui snickered and volunteered to move some of his weapons so Evan could sit in the back of his truck as long as Evan didn’t mess with the C4. He took a moment to think about it, and just shrugged. It’s not like he was going to fit anywhere else.

 

“Alright, Mini and Brock are with me then. Let’s get dried up and head out - we can eat on the way back to base.” Tyler order.

 

After passing out towels and food, everyone split off to their respective cars. 

 

Lui had made enough space for Evan to lie down when the truck really started to speed up, and left the cab window open so he could still talk to him and Daithi, who was riding shotgun. “Alrighty then, ye good with the food ye got, Evan?” Evan examined the granola bar, jerky, and the water bottle and shrugged again, he felt too tired to really care at this point. He hopped into the back, and choose to ignore the frown Daithi sent him. Maybe after food and some rest he would feel better.

 

A couple miles later, and after finishing his food, Evan felt less dead inside and decided to make up for earlier. “Hey, Nogla who’s going to be at the base?”

“Delirious, Anthony, and Terroriser.”

The name Delirious spark something inside his head but the last name made him pause. It felt important in the same way Jon had but something was off. The name had Evan furrowing his brows, staring at Daithi as he took a moment to process before quietly asking, “Um, Terroriser, Who… Who is that?” to which the green man gave him a confused look, answering, “Brine?” and Lui snorted. “Brian,” He corrected the accent Daithi had, and Evan felt his heart jump to his throat. The memory felt like it had just happened, like it was only yesterday that he was sat in the bed of the truck, laughing away.

 

_ “Don’t stand up like that!” Brian hissed as Lui laughed away, pressed on the gas for a moment to make the truck go just that bit faster as their fearless leader laughed away, sat in the bed with his arms outstretched to feel the wind on him. He always loved that, the wind. It pushed at his hair, clothes and body altogether, though not enough to push him off the truck. He always felt a sort of connection to birds, claimed his owl persona and everyone could see that connection, how owl-like Vanoss could be. _

 

_ “I’m fine, Bri!” He called over the wind whipping past his head and filling his ears while he slowly stood up. Brian was clearly worried, watching Evan closely from the back window as his heartbeat leapt into his throat, trying to fight back the urge to yell or yank Evan back down. Instead, Evan felt a gentle pull and looked down to see Brian, flustered, looking away as his hand gripped his shirt tightly. Smiling fondly, Evan crouched back down in the truck, catching Brian’s attention. He looked over and watched Evan lean in through the window to give him a quick kiss and a big grin. “Okay, okay, I’ll sit now, okay? You can chill.” _

 

_ He held his hand through the rest of the ride, crouched in the truck bed and chatting away with Lui while he played with Brian’s hand and exchanged occasional kisses, making their other friend jokingly gag as Evan kept pressing kisses to Brian’s face and hand, distracting him from the conversation he was trying to have. He absolutely loved standing up in the truck bed and filling the wind surround him. He loved time spent with them more, honestly. _

 

_ Brian, B rian, B r i a n _ , the word filled Evan’s head, his breath catching in his throat as he stared at nothing. “Um, Evan?” Daithi asked, worry in his tone as Evan’s breathing started again, picking up -  _ hyperventilating _ , he realized. Evan’s hands tightly gripped onto the truck, keeping him from falling off as his wings flapped twice, once brown eyes now gold looking up at the sky before his eyes closed altogether. A soft thump sounded in the truck as Evan fell hard back into the bed and Lui quickly pulled over on the side of the road. Daithi was out before the car pulled over in front of them, rushing to the back to check on Evan with Lui. Soon, they were joined by a confused Tyler and a saddened Brock.

 

“It happened again,” Brock said softly, climbing into the back to rearrange Evan and his wings carefully. “Again?!” Tyler demanded, watching as Brock took the red jacket off himself and folded it up, placing it under Evan’s head. “Yes, he…” He looked up when a green tinted hand reached out, gently smoothed back some of Evan’s hair and he saw the worried, guilty look on Daithi’s face as they focused on Evan.

 

“Yes. He’s been having these panic attacks and fainting. Anthony and I had to carry him to that hotel to take care of him. He has a concussion, and he’d been torn into by another monster - his hand and side - but they already healed up somehow.” Brock explained, pressing a warm hand to Evan’s cheek. He looked so much more peaceful like that, like he was just sleeping.

 

“He’ll be out for a while. It’ll be okay, you can keep driving, Lui.” Brock told him, climbing out after he gently pushed Evan’s wings, maneuvering them to softly wrap around Evan’s waist. “Are ye sure?” Daithi asked, needed that confirmation Evan wouldn’t just wake up on the drive and fall out. “Yes, I’m sure. If you’re worried, Tyler and I can follow behind you guys to keep an eye on him and honk if he moves.” Brock offered, watching some of the tension drain from Daithi’s shoulders. “He gets a bit… Catatonic when he’s remembering.” A look of understanding crossed Tyler’s face as he looked at his old friend while Brock gently rested his hands on tree spirit’s shoulders and gave him that kind, motherly smile.

 

“He’ll be okay, David. He just needs to rest now. Remember when Evan would get sick?” A little nod answered him. “It’s like that. He probably feels like he’s run a mile, he needs to rest now and piece things together in his head. It’s coming back, but it’s going to be a slow, difficult process. We need to let him rest and sleep it off, okay?” Another nod, and Daithi pulled Brock into a quick hug with a small smile and a grateful, “T’ank ye.”

 

The rest of the ride was relatively uneventful. They drove carefully, Brock keeping an eye on the back of the truck just in case - and when Evan slowly sat up, they didn’t honk the horn quite yet, watching as the owl slowly sat up, wings fluffing up a bit. He looked dazed, tired, hurt. Tyler honked the horn lightly after a minute, only feeling a little bad about the flinch as they pulled over to check on him and make him drink a little water before they continued. Daithi tried to make conversation, but Evan was out of it, so he just told him a few harmless stories, mainly about how Evan played guitar, and how they would all get together for video games and a day off of sorts.

 

When they finally arrived, Evan was still rather quiet, curled up in the corner of the truck bed with his wings around himself as Daithi told him all sorts of things to entertain or distract the man.

 

Getting out of the car, Tyler walked to the bed of the truck where Evan was sitting up, preening his feathers slowly. Brock had been watching him closely, saw how out of it the Canadian still looked, but they let him be. He wasn’t panicked or trying to get out of the truck, so props to him for not losing his mind waking up in the bed of a truck.

 

Tyler pulled the truck bed down, surprised to see Evan already crawl towards him and hold his arms out. He tilted his head a little, missing the understanding look of Brock, catching the surprised smiles of Daithi and Lui on either sides of the truck, so he reached out and lifted him up with an arm around his back and the other under his knees. Evan’s wings folded up a bit and his arms automatically wrapped around his neck, head resting against his collarbone. Tyler wasn’t sure what to say, but he returned the little smile Brock gave him when he turned to face him with the owl in his arms.

 

_ “Your fever still isn’t going down…” Tyler muttered, pressing a cold hand to Evan’s forehead and furrowing his brows at the way his smaller friend leaned into it. He needed to get up and eat, shower and likely more medicine. Evan clearly wasn’t going to move on his own though, groaning softly as Tyler moved his blankets. Instead of letting him be, Tyler pulled the blankets down all the way, noting how Evan whined his name weakly, shivering already. He pulled him into his arms, lifting him up bridal style and taking a moment to get settled holding Ev. _

 

_ Evan just wrapped his arms around his neck, leaning into him and softly nuzzling his cheek against Tyler’s collarbone as he was carried downstairs to get him food and let him see everyone. _

 

_ The next day, Tyler did the exact same thing - he went in, took Evan downstairs to eat, helped him wash his hair in the bath and put him back to bed, tucking him in so he could sleep it off in peace. _

 

_ The day after that, he was surprised to see Evan already sat up in bed, dazed and flushed. Warm brown eyes met his bright blues and he crawled to the edge of his bed as Tyler approached, arms lifted up so he could lift him with ease and Evan’s arms could wind around his neck and hang on, already used to it. He refused to let go of Tyler this time, however, so he sat on the couch with Evan tucked against him, letting his friend sleep a bit longer. No one was too surprised, not even as Brock sat on the coffee table and fed Evan some soup before offering them a blanket. _

 

Jonathan was the first to spot them, pacing back and forth at the entrance of the base. He ran over, but he didn’t try taking the winged man away from Tyler. Instead, he marveled at the soft wings, startled Evan by laying a hand on them. He was taken aback by the gold eyes, mentally noted how scruffy and dirty Evan looked now compared to when he’d last left the base, days perhaps even a week ago? Finding supplies and survivors wasn’t as easy as it used to be.

 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Jon whispered and Tyler stood still, watching the owl examine Jonathan closely. The memories flickered through his head, confusion on his face as he looked over the clown makeup, the black studs in his ears, big ocean blue eyes, the dark brown hair short at the sides, longer on the top and fluffy as ever. The hockey mask with red markings on the cheeks and forehead from his memories. “ _ Jon _ .” He whispered and Delirious grinned a bit, grateful to Tyler for leaning down to let him hug his second best friend tightly for a long moment.

 

Jonathan didn’t want to let go, but he had to, to let Tyler start walking into the base. In the meantime, he struck up easy conversation with his considerably confused friend. He heard about the wound, expressing sympathy, voicing his concern and worry over the fact Evan had gotten hurt. “Luke and I been- been actin’ leaders ‘til you got- got- got back, Vanoss.” He told him. “Did… Did you do a good job?” He felt like he needed to ask. There was a lot weighing on his mind, like the connection he definitely had to Jonathan. He seemed proud as he answered, “Yeah! I- I think Luke and- and I did good!”

 

The conversation was cut short abruptly, however, as they heard the footsteps of someone walking into the living room but the steps stopped, as did Tyler. Evan looked up at gasp, the footsteps darting over to them.

 

“ _ Ev _ ?!” Brian asked, clear panic in his eyes as he finally saw Evan in Tyler’s arms. Tyler’s face turned sympathetic and instead of letting Jon and Evan continue their strange conversation, he passed the winged man carefully over to the clearly worried Irishman. Brian seemed to calm a bit with Evan in his arms, gold eyes confused as he looked at him, just as relaxed in his arms as he was in Tyler’s. Brian’s lips pressed into a thin line, looking him over as he held him before he went and sat himself down on the couch, holding Evan still, regardless of how unnecessary it was. Jon sat down beside Brian and close to Evans head, Tyler on his other side. No one said anything for a few minutes as Evan kind of curled up against him, wings in Jonathan’s lap, who was starting to card his fingers gently through soft, dirty feathers.

 

Brian bit his lip, watching Evan before his other arm went around his waist as well, pulling him into a hug with murmured apologies Evan didn’t understand. Regardless of his confusion, his arms slowly found their place around Brian’s neck, his face kind of tucked into his neck, and a feeling of safety and peace he couldn’t begin to explain came over him, soothing him further. “I’m sorry, Ev, I’m s _ orry. I gotta go with Daithi.” _

 

_ Evan frowned a little, but he didn’t argue. He understood. Nogla could be pretty chaotic on his own. He wasn’t stupid, but he could be kind of easily distracted and it was safer to have his sort-of brother at his side to keep him out of trouble. “I understand.” He said, and that was true. He did understand. He just didn’t like it. A gentle smile crossed the other’s face, that cold hand pressing to his cheek as a soft kiss pressed to his forehead. Evan smiled just a little from the soft affection, but forced a pout as Brian pulled back. “I saw t’at.” Brian chuckled, and Evan whined, leaning his full weight into Brian and making him support him. “You suck.” He grumbled, but the other just laughed, ruffling his hair. “Yeah, sure, Ev.” _

 

“Ev, you with us?” Evan blinked a bit, looking up to see Brian staring at him - along with a lot of others. He couldn’t hold back the whine as he curled one wing around himself a little, tucked his face more against Brian’s neck. He didn’t like being stared at, not at all. Brian squeezed him gently, clearly shooed off everyone else, but Tyler refused to leave his side, as did Jon. Craig took a seat on the coffee table, reaching forward and hushing Brian when he leaned back into the couch with Evan, like some subconscious attempt to protect him. He didn’t hurt him, rather, Craig examined the wound under the gauze around Evan’s head, making sure it was healing. “How’s your head?” He asked softly. Peeking out past his arm, Evan eyed Craig for a moment before he spoke quietly, “Head still kinda hurts…” He nodded and offered a kind smile. “That’s normal. Are you remembering more?” Brian’s smile dropped in a second as Evan thought about it. He glanced back to Jon who was asleep under Evan’s other wing. He looked up at Brian who wasn’t making eye contact. He nodded slowly. “Yeah… Yeah, I am…”

 

Brian looked hopeful, and Evan felt a warmth in his face, his heart thumping in his chest. He rested his head on Brian’s shoulder for a moment, silent as Brian spoke softly with Craig as Evan tried to clear his head, to remember something else…

 

_ “Alright, I want you to slowly back up,” Delirious had said, and Vanoss frowned as his character moved back slowly. “Why?” _

_ “Little more.” _

_ “Why?!” Delirious, clearly holding back laughter said, “You gotta trust me! This is a trust experience, okay? Back up a little bit more.” Evan scoffed, grinned at the screen. “This one of those trust drills?” _

_ “Yeah, yes. Trust-” The alligator scared the absolute shit out of Vanoss as he screamed, “Whoa, god! No!” His ears filled with nothing but the sounds of the alligator and the laughter from Delirious. “I’ll never trust you ever again! Oh, shit! I’m dead!” Evan’s laughter mixed in with his own, the two only laughing harder. _

 

_ “Any guesses?” “Evan, move your mouse!” “No!” The frustration of his friends were clear as he drew the band-aid in Skribbl.io. “This is exactly what the actual thing looks like, okay?” “Draw slower, please, I can’t-” “That’s it! I drew it exactly!” Quickly, a few of them got it, leaving the two Irishmen to figure it out. Evan bit into his lip to hold in the laughter that threatened to escape. “It looked like a fuckin potato with a fuckin’ bra on! Slutty potato!” Brian groaned, and Evan just laughed. _

 

_ Brock, humming away as Brian drew, everyone voicing confusion. “Oh!” Evan grinned as he got it, then furrowed his brows at the strange drawing. “Dude, why did it have to be… Red?” Brock continued humming, smiling away at the computer, tried to not laugh as Anthony asked, “Brock, is your humming important?” Daithi voiced surprise at what it was. Evan just listened. “Are you chasing- are you- are you humming THC?” Anthony finally asked. “THC?” Brock voiced softly, lost as Brian started singing the song. Anthony giggled. Brock said suddenly, “I’m  _ **_taking_ ** _ THC, I’m  _ **_humming_ ** _ TLC!” And Anthony lost it. “Don’t go smoking waterfalls!” _

 

Evan huffed a little laugh at the memories. At Brian’s confused look, Evan smiled up at him, softly went, “ _ Don’t go smoking waterfalls. _ ” And Brian started giggling over the words, adjusting Evan on his lap. “You remember.” He stated, and Evan nodded. “Um…” His wings moved, and they both heard Jon groan as Evan jerked his wing, kind of smacked Jonathan with it. “What was that for?” He asked, grumbling as he sat up properly. Evan turned his head and they locked eyes for a moment, then the owl grinned. He grinned wide, uttered, “Batcoon,” and Jon was crawling out from under his wing, adding weight onto Brian by launching himself into Evan’s arms, hanging on tight as the three laughed together. It wasn’t much, but it was  _ something _ . He  _ remembered them,  _ even just a little.

 

They all settled down on the couch, one by one as they spoke, told Evan of past times, told him stories of themselves being the goofballs they were, told him stories of his love and affection he shared to everyone around him, of how he was their  _ fearless leader _ that always found a way to save them. He always saved them, he was always there for them and he always kept the group together. It was their turn now.

 

The newcomer’s entrance was a surprise, though. Evan was sat on the couch, listening to others talk and try to jog his memory when the door slammed open. Before any of them could really move or worry about who it was, a guy about the same height as Evan with a big grin and snow white hair stepped in, called out, “What the  _ fuck _ is up, buttercups!” Evan looked shocked, confused as a couple of them laughed - particularly Anthony and a tall, blond, black horned demon in bright clothes right behind the white haired guy. 

 

“Who is-?” Before Evan could begin asking about the stranger, the white haired guy dropped himself down full weight into Evan’s lap, giggling away as his arms wrapped around the guy’s waist. “Who are you?” He asked with a frown, watching the bright smile melt away as one blue eye and one red met his. “That’s not a funny joke, asshole. I  _ refuse _ . Try again.” The demon strolled up, gave Evan a stare as Brock’s hand rested on the guy’s knee. “He doesn’t remember anything yet.” The mom of the group whispered, noted how silent everyone got. The frustrated look faded too, leaving concern, fear, a sinking, hopeless feeling in both their guts as their eyes met again. He couldn’t explain why he felt so connected to the guy, why his dismay with Evan’s lack of memory hit him hard too, but it  _ did _ .

 

“Ev…?” The guy sounded… God, he sounded like a scared little kid. And for just a moment, he could see a kid. Just a little boy with a toothy grin and brown hair trying to do what Evan did, trying to make his…

 

_ “Evan!” The boy shouted, giggling away as he chased after his brother. They loved the snow, they loved ice skating and the cold nipping their noses and the goofy snowmen they would build together. They loved playing together, and they loved being the family they were. As they sat side by side inside a sort of snow igloo Evan had put together for them, Jaren looked over at his brother, mismatched eyes bright as he watched him press his bare finger into the snow, dragging it along to write their names in front of them. “I love you.” The boy said, watching Evan’s head raise quickly and he giggled madly over catching him off guard. _

 

_ Evan just smiled wide, pressed a kiss to the side of his little brother’s head and continued on the slow, swirling lettering in front of them. “I love you too, J. You’re the best brother a guy could ask for.” Jaren wrapped his arms around one of Evan’s as he finally finished writing in the snow. _

 

_ Vanoss,  _ “Smii7y.” Their heads jerked up and at that hopeful, teary-eyed look Jaren tried to hold back, he just smiled and wrapped his arms - and wings - around his little brother. It was coming back. Piece by piece, it was coming back to him. One by one, he remembered. How could he forget his brother? He squeezed Jaren close as he looked up at John who just smirked, fist-bumped Evan. It’d be okay.

 

“Evan?” Smii7y called softly. Hours had passed of the group just spending time together, jogging Evan’s memory. It had been quite the struggle, leading to a few panic attacks when the memories were less than pleasant, making him smile wide when they found his favorite memories on accident, warming their own hearts. Now Evan had taken shelter in a room he hadn’t used for  _ ages _ since he’d gotten together with Brian, hiding away from the group and isolating himself to breathe.

 

The boy knocked on the door softly for a moment before going still, listening close. “Come in.” Evan called quietly after a long minute, and Jaren took the invitation, stepping inside and closing the door. The room was dark, illuminated just by the plugged in fairy lights over Evan’s bed where he laid with his wings wrapped around himself. He examined the room and how clean it was - Anthony’s doing, possibly - before he sat on the edge of the bed. “Here to… I don’t know, poke at my head or jog my memory?” Evan mumbled softly, watching his brother closely. But Smii7y did nothing of the sort, shaking his head with a little smile. “No. I’m here to lay on you.” “Wh-?” Jaren pushed Evan’s wings off him, subtly surprised Evan let him before he was laying down on his chest and one of Ev’s hands automatically went up to run through white hair.

 

“You gonna sleep?” Jaren asked quietly after a few minutes, raising a hand to copy the motions and run his fingers through Evan’s messy, still dirty hair as well. Evan relaxed into the bed, eyes sliding shut as his arms wrapped around his brother, wings following the motion. He mumbled some affirmative, and Jaren just kept petting his wings or running gentle fingers through his hair. Keeping him company, keeping him from waking up alone again.

 

Evan was appreciative of the company, curling up to Smii7y as much as he could as they both fell asleep. After nearly three hours of the two sleeping peacefully together, the door slowly opened; John and his name twin stepped in to check on the two after having seen neither of them for a while. They made sure Evan and Jaren were asleep and put a blanket over them before Jon turned to leave. He paused when he wasn’t followed however, turning to see John climb onto the bed, the 6’2” man squishing himself into the space between Evan and Jaren and the wall the bed was against.

 

Their eyes met and John just grinned, pulled the corner of the blanket back as a gesture for Jon to join them. After a moment, he did, laying against their other sides and the two taller men wrapped their arms around Evan and Jaren, making a sort of cuddle pile as they fell asleep with them. 

\--

 

It was day three of Evan missing and Brian was ready to rip his hair out. Search parties had been sent out, but someone needed to man the base and it was agreed that Brian shouldn't be going anywhere so him, Luke and Delirious had been left in charge. Or, more like  _ Luke  _ was left in charge as both Brian and Delirious were fucking  _ messes _ . Brian had given up on trying to calm his manic energy with the cleaning spree he went on, sat down on the couch and tried not to scream. Taking deep breaths, he was hit again on how badly he wanted his boyfriend, making him bury his face in his hands to try not to cry. He felt the couch move as someone sat down and a gentle, shaking hand lay on his back.  _ Fuck, not now _ , Brian was going to do something stupid if Delirious tried to help, like kiss him or hold on to him and never let go. He and Evan had been trying to take it slow with Jon, both of them terribly in love with the clown god. But it had been a series of misfortunes everytime they had tried to show Jon how much they loved him to see if he was even slightly interested in them. 

 

“Brian, I-I know that you are really worried about Ev, which- which makes sense causes he’s your boyfriend and you can be worried about your boyfriend, but um, you really shouldn’t clean the whole base, well, it’s not  _ bad  _ that you’re cleaning! It just that you really shouldn’t be cleaning all of it at once cause, ya know, chemicals will will get you high and fry your brain. Or is it fry your brain and get high? Either way, you need to take care of yourself! Cause I-I don’t, um, Evan wouldn’t like it! He wouldn’t want you to be hurt like this! And- and I don’t either! which I know doesn’t mean as much, but-”

 

Brian cut him off with a broken laugh. “Ye don’t get it, do ye?”

 

“Hey, I miss him too! He’s- he’s my best friend, and- and I-”

 

“About how much we love ya.”

 

Jonathan stopped. His hand stilled where it lay on Brian’s back and and his breathing went quiet.

 

“What?”

 

_ Fock. Well, go big or go home _ . “My favorite part about ye is yer smile, but Evan loves yer laugh best. We both  _ love  _ the way ya dance in the morning when yer making pancakes, and the times ye’ll starting sing or rapping along to nothin’. The grumpy face ye make when there’s no coffee left even though it's the middle of the afternoon and ye just woke up. It drives Evan  _ crazy  _ that ye have no phone, but I  _ love  _ how it makes ye ask the wildest questions to someone that does. And the way ye light up when ye see a teddy bear is the best and worst feelin’ in the world because I love to see ye so happy over somethin’ so simple and pure yet I know ye’ll never look at me like t’at.”   

 

“I- I, I don’t-”

 

“It’s alright, I should have never dumped it on ya like this. Me and Ev wanted to take it slow, but, well, I just, ha, focked it up, I guess. It hadn’t been workin’ but I shouldn’t have spring it on ye like this and right now. God, this is the worst fockin’ timin’. I’ll just go and I don’t know, clean the kitchen. I’m sorry-”

 

“Don’t you  _ dare _ ! Don’t you  _ dare  _ say sorry!”

 

“Wha-”

 

“Just let me finish. I- I-  _ fuck _ ! I love you  _ too _ !”

 

Brian pulled his face out of his hands and blinked at Delirious in shock. What the fuck was happening. Did he just really say that.

 

“I-I love your eyes, and the way they crinkle when you smile! And Evan when he’s singing and his whole body lights up! An-and how both you of laugh even when you’re being assholes. I just, I don’t, there’s so much I love. I just can’t… ugh.” Jon threw his hands up in the air and Brian caught them and intertwined their fingers together. “Ye mean it?” Hope shining in his eyes.

“Of course! I would never joke about this!”

Brian let out a laugh, the happiest he felt in days and swooped down into the sweetest kiss, before pulling back with a swear.

“Wha-what?”

“Evan is going to  _ kill  _ me fer kissing ya first without him here.”

 

\--

“And that’s how I kissed Jonathan.” Brian finished the story, bit his lip as he saw the look on Evan’s face. He didn’t look  _ mad _ , he looked… grumpy. Not mad per se, but he wasn’t  _ happy _ . “Ev, come on,” Brian started, watching his wings fluff out for a moment as the shorter man crossed his arms, gaze drifting off to the side. “Ev, don’t be mad at us…” Brian tried again, slow to step in close, hands going to rest on his sides. He leaned down, brushing their noses together, and he couldn’t help but smile as Evan tipped his head up to press their lips together softly before  he looked away again.

 

“ _ Evaaaan _ ,” the sing-song tone made them both look up to see Jon leaning in the doorway, a childish grin on the god’s face. He started giggling at the slight flap of Evan’s wings, felt his face warm a bit at the way Evan’s lips quirked up in silent delight over the sound he loved so much.  _ So Brian was right _ .

 

“Come ooon, you- you- you can’t be mad at- at  _ us _ ,” The clown said with another little laugh, stepping over and draping one arm around Brian’s neck, the other around Evan’s shoulders. A low whine escaped Evan, but he didn’t say a word. He was trying to be pouty and mad, to hold onto the slight frustration a bit longer, but it was hard to when they knew  _ just _ how to make him smile.

 

A slight huff as he looked away, teeth sinking into his lower lip as Brian teasingly murmured, “I can see you smiling,” and Evan groaned more loudly, dropping his head on Brian’s shoulder.

 

“Hey, look- look at me.” Jon asked, watching the owl stay still for a moment before he looked up, gold eyes meeting sea blue. Despite the lack of words, he was wondering what Jon wanted. He wasn’t left wondering for long when soft, chapped lips pressed against his own. 

 

Evan’s eyes were wide for a moment before they slid shut, one hand moving up to cup Jon’s cheek as Brian’s arms tightened around them both. When he finally broke the kiss, they were both silent, staring at each other for a moment before Evan’s gaze slid over to his other boyfriend, Brian, and he murmured, “You’re a dick for doing that without me,” and Brian was pulled in for kisses as well, smiles on all their faces as things really started to settle.

 

It was relieving in a way he couldn’t begin explaining to be home. Brock was glad to lay on the couch and take a breather after how long the days were since they’d set foot outside of the base in the first place. It was nice to lay down, breathe deep and know they would be okay and safe. To know Evan was safe and recovering, to know they would all be okay - and likely stay safe in the base for who knew how long.

 

He wasn’t just relaxing, though - waiting for the others to show up. It was time for a get-together where they would just chat, relax, be together and know they  _ weren’t _ alone on this hell on earth anymore. As if on cue, a soft knock sounded from the door and he was on his feet with a grin on his face. It didn’t falter one bit to see Jaren and John’s group, Fitz’s hand up from knocking on the door. Brock greeted them with clear delight, warning them John and Jaren were still asleep in Evan’s room, but they could wake them up if they had to.

 

Half an hour later, and the other unnamed group appeared. Jack, Mark, Felix, Ryan, Ken and others. While they filed in, made conversation with everyone else, Brock stood in front of Jack and Mark with big smiles on their faces. It only took a second before they were hanging onto each other tightly. It had been a good amount of time since he’d last seen both of his boyfriends, and he’d missed them dearly.

 

This was shown in the way he followed them around, sat as close to them as he could on the couch. His clinginess didn’t bother him, nor them however - it was like everything was right in the world when they were together. Brock knew exactly how Evan felt when he was with Brian and Jonathan both.

 

It had been weeks since they’d gotten home, since Evan, Jonathan and Brian started their poly relationship. He’d finally gone out on a much shorter mission - just to go out and get more blankets and pillows and whatever useful stuff they can find with Daithi and Craig this time around. It was meant to be short, simple, for them to get home soon with the soft things to replace older ripped up ones.

 

Craig and Daithi had been busy with bags upstairs gathering the blankets and pillows when Evan heard something while he was downstairs by himself. He stepped outside, looking around as he followed the sound. He furrowed his brows as he stepped out, barely hearing Daithi and Craig call for him as he followed the little cries of an animal. “Hello?” Evan called softly, looking behind some trash cans as his two companions stepped out. “Evan, what are ye doin’?” Daithi asked with a frown as Evan quickly ducked down behind the cans.

 

They were both equally surprised as Evan popped back up, a shocked look on his face and a stripy brown kitten in his hands. “Oh my god!” Craig gasped as the two rushed over to see the little furball. She was dirty, her collar nothing more than a worn strap of fabric around her neck. “Aw, she’s so cute!” Daithi exclaimed as Evan smiled a little. She was squirmy, mewling and squeaking away in Evan’s hands and he gently held her close, a finger gently rubbing over her soft ears. “I’m taking her back to the base!” Evan announced, starting to grin. “What are you gonna name her?” Craig asked as Daithi smiled widely and went back to gather more supplies. “Lucy.” He decided.

 

They went on with their mission. Evan went through the next three houses hunting down food, litter and other things like toys and a litterbox for Lucy.

 

When they were heading back to the base in the truck, Evan sat in the bed of the truck, the kitten inside on the seat between Daithi and Craig. Evan kept a close eye on her and Daithi helped keep her from falling off the seat or causing trouble.

 

And when they were finally at the base, Evan hopped off the side of the truck before Daithi was even out. They just laughed at his visible excitement and Daithi handed him the kitten. He darted inside while the other two were left to carry everything in. He was sure it looked goofy with his hands under his own shirt as he stepped in. He was sure it looked even  _ more _ ridiculous as Jon caught him as the little lump under his shirt moved.

 

“What is that?” His boyfriend asked, to which Evan quickly shook his head with a shaky grin. “Nothing! I’m- taking a pillow for myself. Yup.” “Why is it moving?” He couldn’t answer, trying not to wince from tiny claws digging into his undershirt and skin before the little head popped up from his collar and Evan was left staring at Jonathan and Jon staring at the kitten, both silent.

 

“Oh my  _ god _ -” “Please Jon, she was all alone by some trash cans!” Evan quickly spoke, gently wrapping his arms around the squirmy kitten in his shirt as she mewled. Jon started cackling as the kitten got louder and sure enough, that caught everyone else’s attention.

 

It wasn’t too difficult to explain what he’d seen, and they all had to laugh or smile at how clearly adamant Evan was about keeping the furball (“She’ll stay in my room and I’ll look after her and take good care of her!”). Brock just chuckled, wrapping an arm around Evan’s shoulders and hugging him slightly. Anthony plopped down on his other side and did the same as the owl automatically stretched his wings a little to wrap around them, the kitten trying to climb off his lap. “Like a kid pleadin’ for a pet.” Brian commented, smiling sweetly at the pout he was given.

 

They did let him keep Lucy, however (“She could be a  _ great _ mouser one day,” Brock offered, clearly on Evan’s side of keeping his new little pet).

 

It seemed like Evan both had more energy since the incident, and he was more cautious. He wouldn’t leave unless he was sure they were  _ ready _ and had a plan. Since he got the kitten, he opted more to stay home and care for her unless they needed him and his new ability of flight. 

  
And everything seemed right in the world. Brock was spending time with his boyfriends, Evan was curled up on Jonathan with Brian’s arms around both of them, Lucy was curled up in her ped purring away, and everything seemed  _ right _ . They’d be okay.


End file.
